To the baby I lost on December 20, 2018:
I think about you every day. I wonder who you would’ve been. What you would’ve looked like. When you would’ve had your first smile, laugh, taken your first steps and said your first words.
August was really hard. I should’ve been welcoming you into the world, but instead I was celebrating the life of the new baby that was inside of me. It didn’t feel right at times. August 15th was your due date. I wonder if you would’ve arrived on time, or if you would’ve been early like Camdyn was.
It’s been a whole year, I can’t believe it. I will never forget waking up that morning and realizing you were gone. I will never forget waking up and feeling like my l heart had been ripped out of my chest and someone stomped on it a million times over.
I’m sorry that Daddy and I weren’t excited right away. You came a bit by surprise! But we loved you nonetheless. We couldn’t believe we were going to be a family of three. Thank you for showing me how much I could love. You opened my heart to being a mother when I didn’t think I was ready.
Thank you for sending me my sweet Camdyn. It’s a strange feeling because without loosing you, we wouldn’t have him. I know you picked him special just for us.
To the baby I lost a year ago, I will forever hold you close to my heart. One day we will meet again my sweet baby.